Home from the airport with Michele and Carolyn..........
Alia crying in her first car seat ride...........
Alia's first breakfast at Raymonds in Montclair.......
Alia in her high chair at home.......
Alia's first trip to Whole Foods........

Sept 8 Upper Montclair NJ

……Continuing our trip home, Mummy managed to put Alia back into the Bassinet and she slept soundly for the next 5 or 6 hours. When she awoke we were a short distance from landing. Just over an hour later that familiar screeching sound of the plane’s wheels hitting the tarmac echoed through the planes fuselage as we had touched down in the USA.
I have spent many hours walking off planes at Newark airport, but never with such anticipation of life and future as in this particular stroll.
With Alia in Jill’s arms we made our way through the upper level glass corridors in Terminal C until we hit immigration.
We made our way to the non citizen line and soon found ourselves in front of the waiting immigration officer. As told we handed Officer Boswell our passports and the sealed brown envelope that only they could open.
Officer Boswell did not open the envelope but stamped all three passports and yelled “Escort!”
Another officer appeared and was told to escort us to the special waiting area. We were taken down a level and told to take a seat in a medium sized room with about 15 other people all waiting for presumably different reasons and 3 sets of large tables and desks with immigration officers attending them. We saw our brown sealed envelope being delivered to one of the desks.
There it sat for about fifteen minutes until we saw Officer Mendez tear it open look at some documents and tried to call up Alia by her Chinese name. Badly mispronounced I intervened and told Officer Mendez that she was calling us. We approached the desk and gave our passports to the officer. She congratulated us and kept the forms in the brown envelope and we were let out to baggage claim.
Once we had collected our luggage we headed out into America.

Our friend Michele and her 2 year old daughter Carolyn picked us up at the airport. Jill put Alia into her first car seat. She was not too happy with this strapped down arrangement but soon calmed down and fell asleep as we drove home to Montclair.
It’s somewhat overwhelming to put these final moments approaching home on paper.
Jill and I left the USA as Husband and Wife and came back three weeks later as parents of a sixteen month old daughter. Our lives have now changed forever. What was once two is now three (plus the dogs). Although we can’t predict the future we do feel very privileged to be able to give a life to a beautiful child that had no choice but to be born.

We arrived at our house in Upper Montclair, New Jersey and unloaded the car. Jill stayed outside holding Alia with Michele and Carolyn while I went inside to announce our arrival to our three dogs.
Fosse, Gwen and Cyd all ran up to me and gave me their appropriate greetings of kisses, licks and howls, I then escorted them to the back door to let them out and do their business. Jill and Alia greeted them from over the fence in the driveway.
It was time to say goodbye to our friends and go into our house.

What was left of that evening and the following days leading up to Labor Day is a mash of images and moments.
The dogs have been great with Alia. Fosse, our oldest is very gentle with her and touches her and licks her gently. Gwen, while being more frenetic prefers to devour those she loves with licks, but she has been wonderful and patient the new addition to the pack. Cyd too has been extremely caring and more like a concerned mother than a beagle.

We did soon realize that although we had put up safety gates and child proofed the house there was still some fine tuning to do. We had no place that we could really just plop Alia down safely to play, other than her room. So we made it our priority to create a large dog free play zone (used to be the dining room).

Alia’s first few days at home were similar to those first few days in China. She regressed back to that sad child in morning. Although we had hoped that this would not happen it was not unexpected. Her world had been turned upside down again. New home, new country, 14 hour plane ride and all of that.
Her crib was like a mansion compared to the orphanage and the hotel cribs. We had a hard time putting her to bed. She would stand up and shake the crib while screaming at the top of her lungs. Eventually she would fall asleep standing up, and then fight with herself in her sleep for the next 20 minutes to stay standing until the Alia wilt dropped her to the bottom of the crib. Once there she would sleep through the night again.

On the Saturday morning she woke up with her body covered in hives. We rushed her to the doctor who prescribed some meds including children’s benedryl. The hives were gone by the next morning.

With each passing day Alia is returning to her old self. A happy, beautiful and curious child. She will now let daddy play with her and take her in his arms, although in any major situations she still prefers Mummy. She goes to bed a little easier and still sleeps through the night. She takes a long time to wake up in the mornings.
Our daily routine consists of waking her up at around 8am, changing her diaper, Jill then takes her into our bedroom and plays with her while I go downstairs and take care of the dogs. I then join the two loves of my life in the bedroom for a few minutes before we take her downstairs for breakfast.
After some food fun Jill will play with her and/or run errands with her while I go into my home office and start to work. This schedule will change for me once I have to start going back into my office in NYC next week.
A light lunch for Alia, followed by a nap from 2 – 4pm. More play time with mummy and daddy followed by Dinner. Alia loves to go out for dinner; she enjoys seeing other people and especially enjoys our Chinese restaurants. After dinner is followed by a little family baby love and then bedtime.
This is our new and wonderfully blessed life. Jill may add to this in the coming days if our new crazy schedule permits. In the meantime thank you all for sharing these adventures with us. Your love and support has meant so much to us throughout our journey.
All our Love,
Jill, Robert and Alia

Backward Timeline.....Asleep at last in the Continental bassinet......
Free drinks First Class for Jill and Alia......Rabbi looking on...
Alia's first VIP Club lounge.......
Jill and Alia in The Forbidden City, Beijing.......
Jill at Tiananman Square......Chairman Mao looking on.....
nd Alia on the way to the Great Wall entrance.....
Robert, Alia and admiring friends on top of the 24th Watch Tower.....
Robert and Alia and the Stairway to Heaven, 24th Watch Tower.

Beijing wed 7am.
Good Morning Beijing:

With a wake up call and some bad instant decaf in the room the three Kalfins arose to greet the day and to get ready for their adventure to The Great Wall of China.

We made it downstairs for the St Regis buffet at 8:15 and after we were well fed met our tour guide “Demi” as in “Moore” and our driver Gore as in “Al”. We hopped into the car and were on our way. About a 2 hour drive out of the city and into the country with a stop at a well known cloisonné factory.
Why is it whenever you go anywhere in the world and are taken on a tour where there is absolutely no obligation to buy anything you always end up opening the wallet and spending money….and your personal tour guide always plays a big part in this and probably gets a kick back. It doesn’t seem to matter how savvy you are there is always a little souvenir.
At this particular place the tour was actually short and interesting. A good thing as there is nothing worse than being stuck in a room for an hour listening to the history of a craft that you could care less about. And yes we did find some beautiful Cloisonné gifts for ourselves. A cloisonné picture of a mummy and baby panda riding a bike, a burgundy vase for the mantle, and a dog ornament for the Christmas Tree……suckers!
Off to the wall. Another 30 minutes and we were there. The entrance to our particular section of the wall was one long narrow street filled with extremely aggressive gift vendors, all hawking every conceivable Great Wall gift item at unbelievable prices.
“2 T-shirts one dollar” was a common call as the product was thrust at you and your way was blocked at the same time.
Gore had dropped us off and would wait by the car in the parking area. It was time to use the baby sling and Alia kicking and screaming was lowered into this contraption so that she could be carried on my back.
Now you must remember that we were not in Guangzhou anymore with hundreds of other adopted babies but we were in a part of China that was not used to seeing this particular scene. Everybody was fascinated by us, the white American family with an adopted Chinese baby, mostly curiosity mixed with signs of approval. Some folks were outright touched. I guess it depended where we were and what we were doing at the time. However when Alia is in a sling on my back having a tantrum and trying with all her might to backbend her way out of it we do garnish many concerned stares and comments in Chinese.
The culture in China absolutely dictates that a crying baby girl is never ignored and always paid attention to……by her mother.
The experienced western parents that we are know better and we are confident that after 10, 20 or 30 minutes of wailing our baby will stop crying and relax in the sling. Making the way up the steep crowded road through the vendors to the cable car with Alia screaming all the way made us the center of attraction and certainly made our guide “Demi” uneasy.
Finally into the cable car and Alia back into mummy’s arms. No problem there as we were whisked high up into the mountains and the stunning scenery that is the Great Wall and it’s environs.
Off the cable car and back into the sling and more wailing. The Great Wall stretched for miles around us as it climbed up and down, in and around the surrounding mountains.
Truly a stunning sight. Jill, Alia, Demi and I made our way up some steep stairs and stood on the great wall.
We started to walk the wall, not an easy task as the wall slopes up and down, sometimes with no stairs, sometimes with tiny mini stairs and sometimes with very steep 2 foot high stairs. Jill and I looked way into the distance and far away almost into the heavens preceded by a never ending stairway to heaven was the infamous 24th watch tower. Even with Alia on my back Jill and I knew we were going for it.
The four of us started on our trek. Demi was becoming very uneasy with Alia’s crying and tried to take her out of the sling but Jill assured her she would be OK. Shortly after that Alia stopped crying and started to enjoy the ride. A few minutes after that Demi bowed out and told us to go on ahead. Jill and I looked at our goal in the sky.
“Is there a time limit on this tour?” I asked Demi.
“No, take your time” she replied “No time limit”.
With that the three of us waved good bye to Demi and started our arduous mission to reach the 24th watch tower.
You know how sometimes a goal is in sight and seems within reach but you can travel for ages and it never gets any closer? Well two days later with our limited water supply almost drained and Alia’s weight almost breaking my back we reached the summit just in time for sunset. After celebrating the end of the day on the 24th watch tower we returned to business and pitched a tent for the night. We would need a good nights rest to prepare for the two and a half day journey back to the cable car. We hoped that on this night that the temperature would at least stay above freezing.
Well………. OK I romanticized this adventure just a tad. It actually took us about an hour to get to the summit, not an easy walk with the last 20 minutes being one long very steep stairway that climaxed with an even steeper thin stairway consisting of maybe twenty, two and a half foot stairs with uneven footing. As I led the way on those final stairs with Alia remaining quite content on my back a group of Chinese students reached down for me and practically pulled us up those final few stairs to the summit. Their generous hands were offered to Jill a few moments later.
As I was trying to regain my breath I noticed that 4 women were holding an impromptu worshiping ceremony offering incense and fruit to Buddha. They were facing the continuation of the wall that was not accessible to the public as this particular part had crumbled. At the same time the students that had helped us up surrounded us and admired our baby. They were fascinated and touched that we had adopted her. An older Chinese man who was also there offered to take our photo. He did and then we took some pictures with the students.
There was a lot of love and peaceful feelings that transcended race and religion on that summit that day on top of the 24th Watch Tower.
An hour or so later we were back with Demi and on our way back down in the cable car.
Once back on lower ground, Alia once more in Jill’s arms we made our way through the vendors back to Gore and the car.
Having had such a spiritual moment on the Great Wall and not being able to resist a bargain I decided to purchase the “2 for a dollar” t-shirts. As I’m sure you guessed this was a big mistake. Of course they were not going to sell me 2 for a dollar.
“80 Yuen”
“You said two for a dollar!”
“80 Yuen”
“No thanks” I started to walk away but realized that I was alone; Jill and the gang were no where in site. I started to search for them but to no avail, all the while being chased by an angry lady desperately trying to sell me these t-shirts.
I decided that the best thing to do would be to wait where I was by the parking lot and that my family and guide would return. In the meantime I was besieged by the lady who was dropping her price by 5 Yuen every 2 or 3 minutes.
By the time I was rediscovered by Demi who had taken Jill and Alia to the upper parking lot the lady had lowered her price to 25 Yuen for two. I stubbornly refused this great offer and joined the rest of the folks in the car.
To put this in perspective her original offer for 2 t-shirts at 80 Yuen equated to about 10 bucks. Her final offer of 25 Yuen about $3.25….over triple the two for $1 price she was hawking! All silly money really. But it’s interesting how one looses perspective when many items are much cheaper than in the states. Most of us hate to get ripped off no matter what we can afford.
Back to the hotel our daughter’s schedule once again shaken up she became quite cranky.
Once in the room at around 4:30pm I put mother and daughter to bed while I took a short walk around the area and to Starbucks. The Beijing that we were seeing was a huge bustling city full of massive construction, modern skyscrapers and many American fast food restaurants and chains. Not much of the old world was in sight and from what I had heard what was left of that world was disappearing quickly.
Our plans for the evening included going to an area called “Back Lake” for a drink and then on to a well know restaurant near Tiananmen Square for a meal.
We left the hotel at about 6pm and it took us almost an hour in the horrendous Beijing traffic to get to “Back Lake”. In the non air conditioned car Alia never stopped screaming, thrusting and wailing in my arms. Her poor world had been shaken up to the nth degree. Never been in so many cars, an airplane, different hotel rooms. Where are we going now? Poor girl.
Ratty but quiet back in Mum’s care we finally arrived at our destination. A pretty area on a large lake surrounded by restaurants and bars. Jill and I had a couple of drinks but Alia did not last long and we thought it best to go back to the hotel and order room service.
That’s what we did and Alia was back to her normal happy self as we had a great Chinese meal in the room.
After dinner as I took an hour to deal with a work issue that came up Alia fell asleep next to Jill on the bed.
That night she slept between us and as usual she slept peacefully through the night.
We both realized that tomorrow would be another hard and confusing day for our baby and although we had no regrets about our day at the Great Wall we were both looking forward to bringing her home to Montclair and starting her new life in the USA.

Thursday – Final Day In China.
7am wake up call. Breakfast at 8:30 and taxi to Tiananmen Square at 9am.
I won’t dwell on the morning activities except to say that Alia stayed in the sling most of the time as we walked through Chairman Mao’s Tiananmen Square and then to a very quick tour through the Forbidden City.
Back to the hotel to pack and bathe ourselves before our trip to the airport, unfortunately we soon discovered that both the Hotel and the entire district had no hot water. A major bummer facing a 13hr flight.
Not much we could do about it so we made the best of a bad situation and then off we went on our final ride in China to Beijing Airport.
Getting through customs, immigration, security and the additional security again was quite a task. A task made a little more difficult with a cranky baby whose nap time it was as well as traveling with 2 US passports and one Chinese one, and every bag being checked for liquids and gels including all those cream and wet baby items that mums tend to carry around with them. But we did make it through, and although we were pressed for time it was important to me that Alia had her first inaugural drink in the first class VIP lounge. She loved it and will never accept anything less,
Once on the plane we took our two business first bulkhead seats and were delighted to see that the couple across the isle on the right were traveling home to North Carolina with their 10 month old adopted baby. We were not alone.
Jill and Alia sat on the floor playing while the plane loaded up, and when it was time for take off we repeated the Alia noodle stuffing and we had no problem.
We were finally on our way home.
Once we leveled out the flight attendant set up a bassinet for us that attached to the bulkhead wall. A couple of hours after take off we put Alia down in it and she fell fast asleep.
I was on baby watch while Jill was snoozing, that was when Alia started crying in her little bassinet. I watched to see if she would go right back to sleep again but instead she sat strait up. I was scared she would fall out so I rushed to undo my seat belt, move my computer and tray table and get to her. Just in the nick of time I grabbed her and walked with her down the isle. That lasted about 45 seconds before she started wailing and kicking and thrusting to get away from her daddy. We only had another 8 and a half hours of flight left. The only way to stop the crying was to hand her back to mummy.
As I type this she is asleep in mummy’s arms.

Our last Tiger Beer at Rose's......
Playing chase with Alia in the room before checkout.....
Family Portrait in Guandzhou Airport......
Alia's first plane trip......

Tue 9pm China time

The three of us are presently sitting in two coach seats on the way to Beijing from Guangzhou and so far so good…..but more on that later.

Monday night.
The weather cleared up a little and we did go out for a final beer and light show at Roses. Bittersweet as this was definitely the evening tradition that we enjoyed the most. This was followed by dinner and watching the rest of the Emmys on Slingbox in the hotel room before bed.

Tuesday morning we had our farewell breakfast at the Chinese Starbucks and then returned to the hotel to attempt to pack all of our goods into our suitcases. After a suitable struggle we were packed and ready to check out.
In typical manor the bell boy was at our door at 2pm without us calling to pick up our luggage. It was time to say goodbye to our home for the last 15 days “The White Swan”
We had 45 minutes before meeting Amy so we took our trusted borrowed grungy stroller back to the shop and received our $12.50 deposit back.
As we waited in the group departure area we saw at least 30 other couples and their adopted children all parts of other groups here in Guangzhou and all waiting to go to the US Consulate to get their child’s exit visa and to take their oath.
This scene really epitomized life at the White Swan Hotel. A great snapshot if you will. Each and every couple had been through their own special journey here, some for the second time and many for the first. Many had acquired their child from another province and had spent a week there before ending up in Guangzhou and some, like us that got their baby from Guangdon province were at the end of their two and a half week stay here at The White Swan. Whatever pathway had lead us all to our final day here I am sure we will not soon forget the amazing sights of all of us non-Chinese folks from many different countries and their new daughters eating, swimming and playing together in this unique setting, as well as wandering the streets of Shamain Island in our borrowed strollers among the many local vendors hawking their various souvenirs that we all bought.
Certainly an experience like no other and we wish all these wonderful people god speed and good luck.
Amy showed up on time at 2:45, and we waited in the lobby for our driver as group by group of the other parents and children left on their buses for the consulate. Soon it was 3:15 and we were the only family left. Amy remained calm and assured us that the driver would be here momentarily and that we would make the 45 minute trek to the consulate on time for the 4pm appointment.
I questioned the validity of that statement as I new we were tight on time and did not want us to stay another week here.
Finally in our transport and on our way in heavy traffic we were getting quite nervous. Our dear Amy kept assuring us that we would make it. The three of us finally pulled into the US Consulate at 4:05pm.
At this point our calm and controlled Amy darted out of the transport at the speed of light and shouted “Let’s Go!!!”, I looked up and zap! She was gone. I helped Jill and Alia out of the transport and we all ran into the consulate chasing after Amy, whom I really do believe was terrified that we were too late.
As she got to the escalators the guard was closing up the door and as I rounded the corner I could see Amy begging with him to let us through. Thankfully success!
“Passports please”. We presented our passports and ran up the escalators, Amy with a distant lead, myself trying to split the space between her and Jill dragging behind with a dangling Alia. Top of the escalator through the door, Security, x-ray machines and metal detectors. Again we were alone with no other parents or children in sight and our Amy was frantic. Amy and Jill made it through but I buzzed and was detained. “Turn left and go thru the door on the left” shouted Amy as she disappeared with Jill and Alia in tow.
After surrendering my belt to the guards I moved at a brisk pace through the deserted corridor and into the main room at the consulate.

This room could have been any US government waiting room in any city or town in the US. Immigration, unemployment, DMV….you name it they all look the same.

“It’s alright honey, we’re in time”, it was Jill standing in the middle of this crowded room full of parents and children holding our baby. We were the last to arrive but the ensemble gathered in the room all awaited their final official duties in Guangzhou.

After about 10 minutes a short effeminate man in a suite walked into the middle of the room with a handheld wireless mic and started to talk. He said his name was Mr Sydney and proceeded to explain to us the difference between an Embassy which exists only in a Capital City and a Consulate which exists in non capital cities. Both serve the same function. He continued to say that all American- Chinese adoptions had to go through this particular consulate. All children travel back to the US on their Chinese Passports with a US Visa which we were all about to receive. At immigration in the US you hand the officer in the “Non US Citizen” line the sealed brown envelopes that we were about to be given and after a stamp your child is considered a citizen of the US and can get a US passport.
He concluded by saying that the US does not recognize Duel Citizenship for these children.
“Everybody please stand and raise your right hand and repeat after me”. I quickly moved to Jill and Alia’s right and put my left arm around them while raising my right.
We recited the oath.
As often happens at life changing moments like this neither Jill or myself can remember what we promised during that oath. Our minds were overwhelmed and that 60 seconds or so remains somewhat of a mystery. However we will always remember that it was a life changing moment for the three of us.

“Congratulations” Mr Sydney concluded. Jill and I looked at each other with tears in our eyes and gave our daughter a kiss.

It was at this time that Amy reappeared in her calm and controlled mode. She handed over the sealed brown envelope. “Remember don’t open this……OK we go now. Let’s go.”
Back out and into the transport and on our way to the airport, about an hours drive.
Jill had been carrying Alia since 2pm so she was handed over to me and had a complete hissy fit screaming, pulling, tugging, thrusting and wailing. After 20 minutes of this she finally fell asleep………just as we were pulling into the airport.

I handed Alia back to Jill as the four of us made our way to the ticket counter.
On the way Amy had told us that our luggage would weigh too much for our airline and that we would have to pay heavy excess.
At the ticket counter they let us check all bags without question.
“Let’s Go!” ordered Amy, as she whisked us away from the counter.
“See they didn’t charge you, I save you lots of money” Neither Jill or myself had any doubt that Amy would take credit for this….after all it was tip time.
Security Line, we said a fond farewell to our trusted guide Amy who had efficiently and effectively led us through all our official duties as well as some of her choice tourist spots and restaurants during our time in Guangzhou. I slipped her an envelope with an expected hundred in it. She will be missed.
One final wave goodbye and through security.
On our own in the airport and anticipating our babies first flight and her first trip outside her home province.
A quick Chinese airport meal and we were at the gate.
Our plane was due to take off at 7:20 but did not even board until 7:40pm.
Alia was certainly aware that this was different, but she remained a trouper as we carried her onto the plane and sat down in our two seats on the left hand side.
We spent the next 40 minutes while waiting for the plane to move and then taxi wondering how we were going to keep Alia’s ears from hurting when the plane finally took off. Now before you all kindly butt in with your various “Child in a plane” recommendations please know that almost every member of our family has put in their two cents on this one and every single recommendation has been different.
Our tactic was several fold. We had a bunch of Alia’s favorite noodles ready to stuff her with as well as her favorite drink in her sippy cup, and Jill sat in the plane with Alia’s red finger toothbrush on her forefinger and her banana cherry CVS toothpaste ready to clean our daughter’s teeth during take off as she apparently likes this so much. In addition we had the trusted plastic straw and her favorite crackers.
Armed with our baby supplies we immediately started to turn our two seats into a veritable junk yard. Food and toys everywhere….and the plane wasn’t even moving yet.
Alia whose daily schedule had been severely disrupted today was wide awake and ready to party!
As we taxied we started to stuff the baby with noodles all the while Jill ready with her finger toothbrush. We must have taxied for 20 minutes and were running out of noodles as we finally started our take off. As the plane accelerated on the runway more noodles into our daughter’s mouth, they were hanging off every part of her body and were all over her face. The plane left the ground and made its steep ascent as the sippy cup was shoved into Alia’s mouth.
“Put the damn toothpaste on my finger!”
I squeezed a spot onto the finger brush and into the mouth it went!
Alia took this all in her stride and during this time as her parents were franticly working to keep her “stuffed”, she was the perfect little lady.

Beijing 11:30pm
For the rest of the rest of the flight Alia was wide awake playing with mummy on her lap, knocking all her toys and food onto the floor and laughing while I was attempting to write this blog.
Finally during the last hour Mr Sandman took control. As we sit in the car on the way to the hotel Alia remains asleep in her Mother’s arms.

Beijing wed 1am

In hotel, Alia asleep in crib. Posting Blog
Good night and God bless .

The family in the playpen........
Daddy buying gifts for Alia.......
Daddy buying more gifts for Mummy........
The packaged wonders of Chinese Laundry......
Stone portrait of our dog Fosse being worked on.

August 28, 2006 7pm

Our last full day here, and boy are we ready! Miss Alia got out of bed with a smile on her face and off we went to the Chinese Starbucks. We just missed the aerobics class.
Picked up our laundry and bought the extra suitcase (a great Polo suitcase imitation for $15.00) that we need for all of the goodies we bought. Alia and I spotted a couple more outfits for her. Back to the hotel and Alia and I spotted a couple more blouses for me. My mother and I are both blouse freaks, and I am sure Alia will be too. Daddy was resigned to the last shopping spree. Alia is also a shoe freak , and we know for sure she gets that from Nana (my mom)……. or did she get it from Imelda Marcos?
The local Chinese artists can do a special portrait embedded in stone from a picture and Robert decided he wanted a portrait of our oldest and most special dog, Fosse. Fosse was very sick when we left, but on the mend. He had a bad urinary tract infection, so we had to rush all around the day before we left to get him examined and medicine prescribed. He is doing fine now, from all reports. We love him so much, as he is Robert’s first dog, and we have had him throughout our entire marriage. Fosse has been with us through thick and thin. Fosse is the man. We printed a photo of him where he was smiling very big and took it to one of the artists. She started to work on it, and we will pick it up tonight.
The afternoon was quiet. Alia took a long nap while we watched the Emmy’s. Robert has a special gadget called a sling box that enables us to watch our own TV from anywhere in the world. I worked out in the gym while Robert stayed with Alia. Robert went to run outside, but a serious thunderstorm blew in. He was OK about it since he really did not want to run anyway.
Will have to stay in the hotel tonight cause of the nasty weather.

As you know tomorrow we will be leaving this hotel and taking our oath at the US Consulate, it will also be Alia’s first ride on a plane as we leave for Beijing late tomorrow night.

We shall be off-line from about 2am EST Tue, and will only have limited email access prior to returning home. We will continue to add posts when we are able but they may not be as consistent as before. Remember that all this paperwork we are going through, especially at the American Consulate tomorrow when we get Alia’s papers to handover to US immigration officials, allows Alia to become a proud and lucky citizen of the United States of America the moment we land on American soil. God Bless America!
So please keep checking in as tomorrow is another big day and you never know when we will post. Also continue to comment and email us as it is always wonderful to hear from you. Please know that we will wrap up this blog with our trip home to Montclair, NJ as soon as possible after arriving home on Labor Day Weekend.

Love to all, Jill and Robert and Alia

Sunday on the Island......Ballroom Dancing.....
Alia's local admirer......
Fan Dancing and underwear.......
Swimming in the beautiful Pearl River......
Hanging under the Banyan Tree.......
Little Lady with Attitude!

The Year of the Brat
Alia was born in the year of the Rooster, but upon waking from her nap it might as well have been The Year of the Brat. Since mommy does not have many kind words to say right now, I will let Alia tell her story.

“I do not want to wake up, why are they shaking the crib and making those ridiculous noises? Go away, let me sleep, stop it, SHUT THE HECK UP! I do not believe it, someone is lifting me out of the crib anyway. Oh great, it is HIM. He will pay for this. He is saying something about changing my diaper. Give up buddy, it is only pee, it is not bothering me a bit, that is why you buy those super absorbent diapers I picked out. I am going to scream bloody murder and I am going to start now. I do not want to have my diaper changed, or eat, or go to the pool, or play, or be held, I want to SLEEEEEP.

OK you two, especially you daddyo, you have had it your way for most of the day. My turn now. WHAAAAAAAAAAA, YEOOOOOOOOW, take that. Got him in the stomach!! Let me go. Take that, and that, hope I left a bruise on your chest daddy man! SCREEEEEEM, WAAAAAAAIL, DIIIIIRTY LOOOOK. DIIIIIRTY LOOOOOOK AGAIN.

Hey, what are you doing, he is putting me on the floor by my toys. I do not want my TOOOOOOOOOYS idiot. I want to have a tantrum. And I WIIIILLLLLLL! Let’s see how long you two can hold out before I break you. YEOOOOOOOOOW, YEOOOOOOW, YEOOOOOOW. Hey what is going on? They just went into the other room and turned on the TV. Sound like they are having a good time without me. No way, they dote on me. I am the only thing that makes them happy. Wait a minute, they cannot see me, let me crawl to the doorway where they can see me, there we go, there they are. WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA, WHAAAAAAAAAA. God, I am getting a headache, and I can barely breathe. I do not believe they cannot hear me. They are not even looking. OK, one last whopper. YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAH. Ouch, that really hurt my throat. Hey, look at that piece of paper on the floor, cool. I have not seen this before. (hiccup) I think I will pick it up and check it out. (double hiccup) It looks like a tag from one of my new dresses that daddy bought me. (Hiccup/burp combo) I love tags, they are fun to play with. Hey, mommy, daddy, check out this tag. It reminds me of the new dresses I got today. I love my dresses, goo goo gaa gaa. Thanks daddy, I will look very pretty tonight when we all go out and party, gaa goo, more cute noises. Hey, here they come, and they are still smiling! They are picking me up, thank heavens, cause I really need them and love them. I cannot help it, I am going to smile. Darn it, I smiled. Hey, it feels good to smile, especially when they are holding me and kissing me. I feel bad, I was really mean to daddy. I will give him my biggest smile. Yep, it worked. He has completely forgiven me. Hmmmmmmmmmm………..”

And Alia was still a little cranky the rest of the evening, but we will blame that on gas!!!

August 27, 2006 7pm
Morning wake up call, and Alia woke up with a smile. We are learning that she needs time to wake from her beauty sleep. A lovely breakfast buffet, as we had been absent the last few mornings, since we found the coffee shop. Lots of fruit, eggs, cauliflower, and oatmeal, along with orange juice. Then off to do a walking tour of the island. Today we took a lot of still photos to include in the blog, so all our readers can get a feel for the life of the Chinese people in Guangzhou. Very artistic and sweet, they were very happy to show off for us. And very happy we had a happy Chinese baby. The pictures explain themselves, so please enjoy.
Then we headed for our favorite shop to buy many gifts, no not for Jill, but for family and friends. Our favorite shop gives us free gifts and a special, special, price, just for us. It was a lot of fun, and now we have to buy an extra suitcase to pack it all in.
Back to the hotel and big spread on the bed of all the many many fun gifts. Alia sat in the middle, and admired everything. She is very excited about the gifts. She explored and approved of them all. Of course, Alia came out very well in all of this, with two new outfits, two new dolls, two new pair of shoes, and a beautiful fan. Mommy reorganized all of the booty, and put it in a suitcase. Naptime was pretty uneventful. A good two hours, a semi grumpy wakeup, but she did not have the nerve to go as far as she did yesterday, and we are getting a little more savvy. Mommy left to work out in the gym, while daddy was feeding Alia. Daddy said, “I think she is going to poop”, and Mommy said, “Good Luck!” And lo and behold, when mommy returned, Alia had pooped, and father and daughter had gotten through it with flying colors. Daddy ran, while mommy wrote this, and now it is time for a shower and our dinner traditions. Alia has been adorable all afternoon, learning to feed her dolls, and almost walking, and smiling so much that it must hurt her cheeks!

Alia checking the daily news........
Alia relaxing on her float with Mum and Dad......
Alia choosing her favorite Diapers.....

Sat Aug 26th 5pm

Yesterday:
The rest of Friday consisted of pretty much the same routine. You’ve heard it before so we won’t spell it out for you. Suffice it to say that the joy we get on a daily basis from our daughter is absolutely magical. That beautiful face, that incredible smile!
I just had to look back at those pictures from those first three days to remind myself how sad she was when we first got her.
In truth though we are anxious to move on and leave Guangzhou and although we will never forget a moment of our time here we want to get her home and work through the next phase of her adjustment. We want her to meet and bring joy to her family and friends that have been following these adventures with us.
It is getting closer and there is a light at the end of this tunnel.

Today. 5pm
Weekend in Guangzhou.
There is a place called Danny’s bagels in town that is actually a pizza joint about a 15 minute drive from the hotel. Yesterday around tea time we ordered a delivery of a bunch of food just so we could have a Bagel and Cream Cheese. We’re not talking New York/New Jersey Bagels here, more like a small step below LA bagels, but none the less a much needed taste sensation. So this morning we took our left over bagels to the local coffee shop and sat out on the terrace and watched the weekend scene go by.
Shamian Island, which is where we are located, is probably less than a mile around. Yesterday I went running outside for the first time. Could not face the treadmill again, and although hot and polluted the ample Banyan and Eucalyptus trees that are planted here offered much shade. I’ve always liked running in new places, much to see to make the run pass more quickly. On yesterday’s run I saw 3 weddings and the police practicing their riot moves in the local park as well as children swimming in the dark and ugly Pearl River.
This morning after our breakfast we went for a partial walk around the island. An amazing cultural sight awaited us. All the locals and their families were out. The river walk was packed full of Tai Chi classes, Fan dance classes, Sword movement classes and ballroom dancing classes, all happening next to each other. Also groups of ladies singing Chinese songs with a conductor pointing to the words, couples playing badminton, kung fu being practiced and many people playing the Chinese equivalent of sac ball, but with a shuttlecock instead. All were happy as this was the start of their weekend.
All the music, the noise and the kids sent our daughter to sleep in her stroller.

The rest of the day so far has followed the normal routine. After I wake my wife and daughter up from their naps to the pool we go.

Alia Drinking.........
Alia Drawing..........
Alia Walking..........
Alia Playing.............

Fri Aug 25th China.

Yesterday,

After a playroom session where Alia attempted to improve her standing skills we put her down for a short nap.
3pm it was time to meet Amy. She had been back to the Civil Affairs Office and had received some of Alia’s papers including her Chinese Passport. This afternoon’s duties with Amy included getting a passport photo of Alia and getting her the required Chinese medical examination.
First across the road from the hotel to the photo shop for the passport photo. It was raining cats and dogs outside and we almost stepped into a poodle, but we protected Alia with two large hotel umbrellas.
Alia, who has been great at posing for photos would not comply for her passport. Our baby’s photo is of a scrunched up Alia face.
Off to the “Clinic” for the medical exam, the rain had subsided so we walked for about 10 minutes until we reached the clinic.
A series of 3 quick exams by 3 different female doctors yielded a perfect baby. These exams are notoriously basic and can’t be taken too seriously although they are law. Alia wasn’t too bad considering she was being measured, weighed and prodded.
A quick walk back to the hotel then we spent an hour or so in our room with Amy filling out paper work and paying our final fee for our US Consulate interview.
That should be the end of our official duties until our last day in Guangzhou on Tuesday.
That is the day we have our exit interview at the consulate and take our oath.
So what to do between now and Tuesday? Well it’s raining again so let’s go back to the playroom.
The next hour or so in the playroom Alia made a few new friends and had great fun playing. This was followed by dinner at a Shanghai Cuisine restaurant down the road and a nightcap at Roses before bed.
Alia crashed early that night. Asleep at Roses and after a quick diaper change immediately asleep in her crib.

Our daughter makes incredible improvement on a daily basis. She loves being with us and is so happy……and so are we!

Friday am

Nothing really to report yet today. Raining outside, breakfast in the coffee shop and getting ready for playtime.
More to come….

The Buddha that we were blessed in front of at the temple
A group of adopted orphans and their mothers having their photo taken at our hotel
Alia and Jill playing at dinner
Nap time for Alia on our bed

Go Seminoles!

August 24, 2006 12 noon China Time

Yesterday:

We were totally sick of the buffet by now, so we ventured out into the local neighborhood for the Chinese version of Starbucks. A lovely stroll down a local street with an extensive median/park in the middle with playgrounds, fitness circuits, fountains, beautiful plants and the tantalizing aroma of eucalyptus trees. We are staying on an island within the city, and this strip looks as if it were once the home of civil buildings—rich and grand architecture abounds. Sitting on the extensive balcony of the coffee house, we watched the people go by, as they watched us enjoying our breakfast. A fascinating experience as we became part of the everyday life of the Chinese citizens of Guangzhou.
We were enjoying ourselves so much, we had to rush back to the hotel to meet Amy and off to the temple we went. When we arrived, we had to push our way through many armless or otherwise mutilated beggars. This was a city temple, and a very busy one. Long lines and many people, worshipping the many huge bronze Buddhas. Amy taught us how to worship by lighting incense and saying prayers in front of the Buddha, facing four different ways as we did. We moved into a separate building where a priest was giving service. He was chanting and tossing sacred water on the worshippers who happened to be a very large group of Americans, with their newly adopted babies. Amy informed us that we would be next for a private service. ( She obviously had used her many powers of influence to pull this one off). The four of us, Amy, Alia, Robert, and myself were ushered into the worshiping area where we knelt before the Buddha statue and the priest. Amy told us to close our eyes as he chanted. We did, and you might know that this is when Alia decided to try and walk for the first time. Buddha has the power! She stood up, kicked her feet, and started to climb on me. Robert and I each peeked with one eye. Fortunately the priest doused us with the sacred water anyway. On the way out you take coins to toss into the mouth of a Buddha statue as a donation. You get three tosses to get it into the Buddha’s mouth, which means extreme good luck in your lives. I tossed my first one and in the mouth it went!!!! I took one for Alia and in the mouth it went!!! People were astounded, and Amy said she had never seen that before. Don’t ask me!
We want Alia to be aware of the Buddhist religion, as it is quite a peaceful one, with respect for all life. We are raising her as a vegetarian, like us, and Buddhism supports this belief, as well as, probably being her native religion.
Home from the temple, and to the playroom for some more entertaining fun. Playing with the other children and practicing walking blah blah blah…….then naptime..blah blah blah….then pool time…blah blah blah…..then buying some more gifts for Jill, (and the family) then Rose’s and Chinese dinner where she had tofu, fried celery, and taro root, with noodles…..plus congee, a special rice porridge…delicious!!!! She had a big Buddha belly went she went to sleep.

August 25, 2006
Morning and bath time. Off to the neighborhood Chinese Starbucks and an extra special treat. Right in front of the café a Chinese dance class!!!! About thirty women, working out to beautiful Chinese music, doing lovely graceful movements. Alia sat in her stroller, fascinated, and started singing along. Mommy wanted to go give some corrections but restrained herself. Many local people stopped and chatted with us, or waved to the baby.
We were very close to a food market that I would like to walk through, if I can really put it that way. It is the one place in the city where dogs and cats are slaughtered for human consumption and fur for clothing. They are skinned alive, and dogs are torn apart before they are slaughtered in the belief that this makes the meat sweeter. Many fur trimmed items in the United States, are the fur of dogs, especially golden retrievers. As an animal activist, I feel it necessary to see this. This is a very controversial international concern, with the Humane Society of the United States of America, trying to teach the people differently. It is a slow process to change anything in the world’s oldest civilization. Many restaurants have pictures of dogs and cats with a big X drawn through them to signify that they do not serve the meat of these animals. Have not decided if I can handle it yet.
Back to the hotel, change a smelly diaper, play in the room and write the blog and then playroom.

August 22, 2006 2:31pm China time—Alia’s 16th month birthday

The usual morning festifications. Wake up, clean up, write the blog—which took forever this morning for obvious reasons—breakfast buffet. After the buffet, we returned to the room, and while Robert posted the blog and answered emails, Alia and I learned to color.
We had purchased a coloring book and crayons the previous evening, and Alia was quite incredulous at these new toys. Her screams of amazement when she first drew a line on the paper made both of us all sappy again. Another goal of the day was to get her more comfortable on her feet, and the crayons became a great lure. We put them up on chairs and before long she was crawling to each chair and hiking herself up to a standing position. Then she got to draw a little, before being lured to the next chair. We put some marching music on and Robert marched around the room as I held her on her feet. Suddenly she began to lift her feet up and down, and I pushed her forward as she did it. We practiced quite a lot, and she is a pro at hiking herself up now. Still working on walking. In the middle of all this, she said “mommy!” She is becoming very vocal, and now has the courage to babble quite loudly. So little Alia is catching up: talking, climbing, marching (while being held under the arms), coloring, nodding and shaking her head when given a choice, and she will come to us when we call her.
We took her to the playroom and I quietly disappeared while she and daddy had a fun playtime together. No tears, only happiness. I watched the two of them playing together from outside the room, and it was a very precious thing. Robert was even able to lift her up and put her into the stroller without any resistance. I hurried back to the room, to get there before them and when they came in together, I got a big smile from my daughter. I felt that she had been very confident that I would be there. Nap time now………..
Nap over and it seems that our babies digestive system is up and running.
After a little playtime in the room we ventured out to the pool for some more fun times.
Alia had a great time in her mummy’s arms swimming around and splashing around the kiddie pool and then had fun watching Daddy get wet…..again and again.
Our evening followed the usual fun pattern that we have become accustomed to, an evening walk-around, Roses Bar and Dinner. Alia drank from the sippy cup by herself for the first time at Roses and asked mummy to help her “play walk” again then we all went to a beautiful new Chinese Restaurant in the hotel.
Back to our room and quickly to bed.

Tomorrow the temple to give thanks for our baby.

All dressed up for the trip to the orphanage
Alia in her old crib with her caregivers
Orphans asleep on plywood
Alia with her inmate boyfriend
The school where Alia was abandoned and found



Relaxing at the pool after a long day

Tue Aug 22st 10am China time

Hello friends and family….Yesterday was another amazingly emotional and exhausting day, but a wonderful day and all three of us reached the end of it successfully and with flying colors.
Before we get into that let’s take a brief moment to recap the rest of Sunday night.
After Alia woke up from her nap we stripped her naked and tried bathing her in a bath again. This time was much more successful as Jill soaped Alia up and also washed her hair and made a spook in it without any real protest.
Time to start our evening: We dressed our baby up in her new ladybug outfit, sat her in her stroller and out we went. First we went to our local stores to buy Alia a new outfit as a lot of the clothes that we brought with us were too big for her, especially the bottom halves. We also thought that this was an excellent time to test out the virtues of “Chinese Laundry”. Every local store regardless of what it sells also specializes in “Chinese Laundry” and of course at a much less expensive price than at the hotel.
Next it was back to Roses for a beer, followed by some Ma Po Tofu and Noodles at the Chinese Restaurant in the Hotel. All the while our little darling was behaving impeccably.
Time for bed, and time to prepare for the visit to the orphanage trip on Monday.


Monday Aug 21st:
We arose around 7:30am and was very happy to smell the oh so sweet aroma of our babies poop in her diaper. Now we had changed plenty of diapers since we got Alia but this was the first of this kind. Another new challenge that we both (especially Jill) arose to with flying colors. Down to the breakfast scene and another fun time was had by all.
Next getting Alia dressed for the trip, and back down to the lobby at 10am to meet Amy to take us on this trip.
Amy, was dressed in New York Black, she was reacting to a Jill’s comment the last time we saw her. Jill had noticed and said that she always wore white and in NYC everyone always dressed in black.
Amy hustled the three of us into the van and we were on our way.
The trip to the orphanage would take about 80 minutes and that gave us more time to reflect if we were doing the right thing. It was important to us to see where Alia lived her first 15 months but we were very concerned that the visit might have an adverse affect on Alia and that she might regress. All those great strides that were made over the last week may be reversed. We were assured by Amy that she would be fine and all would be well, but we were worried nevertheless.
The 80 minute trip took us out of Guangzhou, onto the highway, thru some not so attractive farmland and duck farms and into Alia’s home town of Quing-Yuan.
This home town had now turned into a city of over 1 million people, surrounded by small mountains that you could hardly see from the pollution, Quing-Yuan City is known for it’s Chicken and chicken dishes. Amy was already talking about the Chicken lunch we would have. We once again stressed to her that we don’t eat chicken.

Once in town our driver stopped several times to ask directions and we were finally escorted to the orphanage by one of Quing Yuan’s finest on a motorbike.

We turned down an ally and recognized the director of the orphanage from the hand over the previous week. He directed the van where to park and we got out into a small ally of concrete. He unlocked the door to the orphanage and we walked up 3 flights of ugly cement stairs in a dark stairwell.

From what we understood, this particular orphanage was state run and occupied the third floor of this building. 24 orphans, about half who are special needs.

As we approached the third floor we heard a couple of dogs barking and Jill and I gave each other a glance. When the director opened the door we were greeted by a gaggle of 7 very excited ladies who were overjoyed to see Yang Guan (Alia).
Yang Guan (Alia) smiled and immediately went into one of the caregiver’s arms when prompted to. We had been told that they would want to hold her and that it was OK.
However Jill always tried to stay within eye shot.
We were let into one room that was set up as a waiting area, asked to sit down as they poured us tea, all the while the ladies playing with Alia.
On a thin third floor balcony laid two dogs. I asked Amy to ask them if the Children had any interaction with them. She was told that all the children know the dogs, recognize them and their barks and are not scared of them but there is no actual inter-action.
We looked up and all the ladies with Yang Guan (Alia) had disappeared into the next room. Amy turned to Jill and told her that she could go with them. So Jill quickly followed while I continued to sit, following what I thought was convention and not being rude sipped my tea.
At this point it was only myself, Amy and the director and his friend in the room. It was obvious that the men of this orphanage had little to no contact with the children.
I couldn’t stand it any longer so I picked up my tea and walked into the next room.
It was a smallish playroom with a few toys, a TV and pull down backdrops to take those assignment photos against.
The women, Jill and Yang Guan had already moved to the remaining room, the Crib Room.
I went thru that door to see all the women and Jill surrounding Yang Guan (Alia) who was now standing in a crib. “That’s her old crib” said Jill to me as I entered.

The room itself was big enough to fit 20 or so cold metal cribs, many of them side to side or front to back. Nothing but a slab of hard masonite substituting for a mattress in each one. Most of them were occupied by children ranging from newly born to 5 years old, all with longing and loving eyes, some of them standing to greet their returned Yang Guan, some of them asleep on the wood and some just vacantly staring. The room itself was barren and sterile.
While Jill watched over the fawning Yang Guan adoration I walked around to each crib and shot video so we would always have these vivid images close to us.
It seemed to me that the special need kids ran the gamut from very healthy to very bad. One poor autistic child, a boy (the only one to have a mattress), could only lie in a twisted position and stare helplessly from his position on his side. Another beautiful child, a 5 year old girl, the oldest inmate at the orphanage seemed totally healthy, running and talking, etc. And I could not figure out why she had not been adopted. It was not until she was playing tumbling games with one of the caregivers that I saw that her feet were deformed. It was heartbreaking because her deformity in no way dampened her spirit or stopped her from running or jumping or playing. Yet this little girl may never see the light of day.
I mean this literally, as there are no outside activities no fresh air and the only daylight these children see is what seeps through the ally windows.

Now I must say that after painting this sad and grim picture there is absolutely no doubt in our minds that while not concentrating on child development the caregivers of this orphanage gave Yang Guan much love and attention in her first 15 months of life. They all seemed to love her very much.
As for our Alia (Yang Guan), she was doing well. She seemed to enjoy being with these ladies again, and even more so with some of the other inmates.
At one point they put her into the crib of an old boy friend who had occupied the adjoining cell to Yang Guan’s. He was a cute little boy who was about the same height. Apparently they used to wave at each other thru the crib bars. At one point when posing for a photo he put his arm around her and she beamed her beautiful smile.
We presented the orphanage with a gift of stuffed animals and they were gratefully handed out to some very happy children. These were absolutely the only toys that we saw in the crib room.
After Jill and I entertained the ladies with a brief time step which we were asked to repeat several times Amy entered the room and announced that it was time to go.
Jill and I looked around one more time in the crib room and followed the ladies still holding Yang Guan to the exit.
Jill took Alia (Yang Guan), who came into mummy’s arms without protest. We asked Amy to thank the ladies for taking such good care of our child and for loving her.

Amy led the way out. As we looked back we could see the ladies waving and wiping tears from their eyes.

For us, we were next going to the place where Yang Guan was found.
For the Orphanage, it was a big day. They were expecting a visit from an American family with their child who had been adopted from that orphanage 4 years ago, and they are back in China readopting.

We piled back into the van for a 30 second ride to the gated entrance to the school where our child was abandoned.
As we got out of the van with Amy and Yang Guan’s primary caregiver we were told that this was the number one school in the city and shown the exact place that Yang Guan was found in the paper box.
A large school, probably a 1960s structure with a guard house and large metal gates situated on a very busy main road.
We took some photos and some video and then let the final caregiver say farewell to her Yang Guan.
As both Yang Guan and the caregiver started to reach out to be in each others arms Jill figured it was time to take back Alia and get the hell out of dodge.

Back in the van, Alia seemed quiet but OK as Amy announced “We go to lunch now, the director of the orphanage said it has the best Tofu in Quing-Yuan”.
Jill and I looked at each other. I guess we should have one meal in Alia’s home town.

Another private dining room with a big TV in a chicken restaurant in Quing-Yuan.
The first dish that came out was the famous chicken complete with a squashed, flat chicken head. Jill and I politely explained again that we don’t do Chicken.
This was followed by two really good tofu dishes and a noodle dish. The food was very good, but we had just finished our “eat till you puke” buffet breakfast at the hotel 3 or 4 hours earlier and we are really not lunch people.
Alia, on the other hand seems to be able to eat at any time and she did.

On the journey home I had Alia on my lap and she only wanted mummy. But we were strong in our resolute and she cried herself to sleep on daddy.

Back at the hotel we hung out on the bed with Alia for an hour or so playing and talking with the love of our lives. Her smile, her laugh, her grin, her personality and her spirit melts our hearts and our souls. We are so grateful for her, and to be her parents.
This is without a doubt the happiest time of our lives.

5 pm Monday:
After playing on the bed it was time again for the pool. Alia wasn’t quite as comfortable as before in there, but it had been a long day for her and she hung in there. She was quite happy sitting in the stroller and “Hanging Out”.

After getting dressed we wandered the shops in the hotel and bought more “Gifts” for Jill and then went for our nightly beer at Roses. Alia was definitely getting tired but did her best to amuse us.

A quick trip followed to get our laundry. A beautiful job all items of clothing washed and folded, and categorized and pressed flat into various plastic bags.

A quick Japanese snack in the restaurant and then time for bed. Boy was it time for bed! Jill and I had no energy to write the blog we were completely drained.
So hoping for forgiving, readers we put our baby to bed and then passed out.

More photos to follow in an hour or two. We must go for breakfast before we miss it.

Love

Jill and Robert

Good morning friends...

This is Alia late this afternoon, several hours after visiting the orphanage.

We are so tired at right now and will catch you all up tomorrow.

To our relatives: Our personal email seems to be down at the moment and we are not receiving.

Love to all from all of us!

Robert, Jill and Alia.

Daddy and Alia playing "Nose"
Little Naked Clean Alia
Our Sleeping Angel with Pooh Bear and Mr Parrot
Alia just said "Daddy!" followed by a Shakespeare Sonnet
Alia and her new friend Sarah in the playroom
Mummy and Alia in the playroom

No pictures of the enema experience (see following post) so we thought you'd appreciate this picture of one of the clearer days in Guangzhou. Picture from our room overlooking the Pearl River. Guangzhou: poop...I mean pop 10.5 million.

Aug 20th, 5:30pm China

Yesterday Afternoon:
Some cute little baby sounds came from the crib and without too much ado, Alia was made ready for the pool adventure. We dressed her in her yellow flowered bathing suit that we had bought over a year ago at Costco, put her sun hat on, and made the scene. On the way, we stopped and bought her some water wings. We rolled straight over to the children’s pool, where many babies, including her friend Eden were frolicking in the water with their new parents. Not knowing what to expect, I held Alia in my arms and eased us in, as Robert helped to balance us. She is a natural bathing beauty, and immediately began swirling her legs in pleasure, slapping the water with her hands, and getting us all wet. She loved floating on her back the best. Her friend Eden, had a pretty yellow baby holder for the water that her parents had just purchased. They tried to put Eden in it and she screamed bloody murder. They were very sweet, and offered Alia a chance to try it. She agreed, and we plopped her in no trouble. She leaned back and enjoyed the ride, as poor Eden’s parents looked on. Alia looked as if she should have a Shirley Temple frozen drink and a magazine as she floated about. Before we could try out the water wings, we had to leave the pool cause of a thunder storm, so that will remain for another day. We returned to the room, stripped her naked and wrapped her in a big bath towel. She and daddy played “you got my nose!” for a long time.
We had made arrangements to go out for dinner with Eden and her parents, so after this playtime, we all cleaned up and headed to the restaurant. Eden’s parents had suggested a Cantonese place they had enjoyed that was by the hotel. We headed for our table and had to pass a whole live display of what could be ordered off the menu, including worms and roaches. I almost opted for a coke again, but thankfully there was tofu and noodles on the menu. Alia proceeded to be about as cute as she possible could through dinner, and Eden tried to be cute too. Alia shared our tofu and noodles, plus had some soft boiled peanuts. She waved at all the waiters and was cracking mommy up big time. We said goodbye and headed to Rose’s for our beer and the light show. Daddy was a little down, cause although Alia played with him, and smiled at him all day long, she still gave argument about him holding her. At Rose’s, we faced the stroller so Alia could only see daddy, and they had a very good time. Daddy rocked her stroller back and forth and she conked out big time. Never woke up, even when we put her to bed. What a good girl! We stayed up another hour or so discussing the fact that she had not pooped yet.

Today:
Whew, this is gonna take a long time to write, cause a lot of crap happened today.
Breakfast as usual, except we were there earlier cause daddy was afraid the hash brown potatoes would be gone. Alia had much better manners today, and ate in a very lady-like way. We came back to the room right after breakfast, cause we wanted to do some research online, about babies and pooping. We figured Alia was so talented that she did not poop, but upon researching the subject, it appears that without exception, all babies poop! We decided that since she had not pooped since we got her, we maybe should take her to the children’s clinic at the hotel. We played with her in the room, while we debated the subject. It was some of the cutest play yet. Robert has been working very hard, trying to get her to say “Daddy” but so far, very few sounds have come out of her little cupid lips. We had talked so much about pooping that, the idea appealed to Daddy. I continued playing with our girl, AND she handed me a toy and said what appeared to be “DaaDeee”. I yelled to Robert and he went “noooooooo!” from behind locked doors. I guess it was Alia’s little joke. Daddy reappeared and I do think she said it again, and Robert collapsed in my lap in tears. I bopped him on the head, and sobered him up.
Down to the clinic we went, but it was closed for lunch, so we headed for the playroom.
Lots of kids again, and Alia joined right in, playing with all the thingees she did before.
There was a new little girl, named Sarah, who had only been with her parents for two days, and like Alia had been, Sarah was very sad. Our gentle and sensitive girl saw Sarah across the room, and crawled full speed ahead, to hand her a block. Sarah stared at her very seriously and then took it from her. It made Sarah’s mother very happy. Alia then proceeded to yank it back from her, but we won’t dwell on that! We were talking with the other parents, comparing notes. Most of the babies were walking, but Alia is still holding out. As we were discussing this, Alia crawled away, grabbed on to the side of a big playpen, stood herself up, and tried to climb up the side! She had a big grin on her face as we ran to catch her. From then on, we made some successful strides (no pun intended) to get her walking. She played side step, marching, egged us on to come catch her, and much more. She never let go of the side of the pen, but she was on her feet. She was consistently happy, and joyous, her beautiful smile making everyone happy.
The clinic was open now and so we went. We met Kitty, the nurse, and Dr. Woo. Kitty spoke some English, and Dr. Woo (a woman) spoke none. Kitty picked up a pen and paper and asked us what the problem was. We responded that our baby was not pooping. She asked “since when?” and we innocently said “since at least last Tuesday.” The pencil jumped out of her hand, and her eyes bugged out. “TUESDAY?” she said. And we felt like the biggest morons on earth. Kitty translated this info to Dr. Woo, who immediately cracked up. Now, in all fairness to Robert and I, we had heard and read that it could take several days for a Chinese baby from an orphanage to poop, cause they mainly ate rice, so we waited it out. Dr. Wu and Kitty went into action, preparing an enema, a diaper, and a potty seat. Within seconds the beautiful smile had been transformed into a horrible grimace as the enema was put in place and went to work. Mommy and Daddy were cooing and stroking her throughout it all, trying to be very brave. After a minute, that seemed like a year, Kitty lifted Alia off the table and held her over the potty seat, with her knees up to her ears and her little baby butt hanging over the seat. Alia’s screams grew louder, and her face more red, as we all waited. Finally two beautiful brown turds shot out of her tushie, followed by a couple softer ones. A fresh diaper was put on and an exhausted and relieved little girl fell asleep in my arms. We returned to the room, some special herbal tea for digestion in hand and Alia was so pooped out (no pun intended) she fell to sleep in an instant and woke up two hours later and farted.

Jill and Robert

Robert's two bathing beauties.......
Father and Daughter playing.......
The end of a long day.......
Details in the China am

Well, well, well. Breakfast went extremely well. Alia sat right down in a high chair for the first time and had a total blast as she PIGGED OUT! She had an extremely delightful time slopping around in the food. Everything besides rice is pretty much a new sensation for her, and the look on her face as she tastes things for the first time is hysterical. She actually took a big spoon and attempted to feed herself several times. Some scrambled eggs made it into her mouth, before the rest went on the floor. She tried everything including some more noodles that made her smile again (noodles for breakfast are very common in China). She was very generous and insisted that Robert and I share the cheese she was eating. So, Robert had to pretend to like cheese and actually had to put some up near his mouth so his daughter would be pleased. I took 17 photos of her eating breakfast.
We sat there so long having fun with her that they finally had to inform us that the buffet was closing.
Playtime now-- so we went right over to the playroom at the hotel. Did not know what to expect as the last time we took her she just sat on the floor and cried in such a sad way.
Not today. There were many other children in the room and she was fascinated. She got on a roller thingee and pushed herself around the room with a very joyous look on her face. She stood up and took hold of a pushie thingee and actually took steps on her own as she pushed it all around the room. We took her over to a small door type thingee, and she opened the little door and crawled through. She smiled very big when mommy tried to crawl through the little door and got stuck, and was very happy when daddy pulled mommy through! Alia was very charming with the other children. She would share her toys and crawl right over to everybody. She crawled all the way across the room after her daddy, and gave him a very big fat smile. She built stuff and knocked it down, she tried to throw a ball, and she pressed a lot of button thingees that made many different noises. After two hours she got a little cranky, so back to the room we went and she is napping as I write this. As far as we can tell, it seems that Alia might be two or three months behind developmentally, but she may be holding out on us. Regardless, she is very bright, and will certainly catch up fast. She is very tiny, and looks like she is just a year old, even though she is sixteen months on August 22. We think she will be a very petite girl. The change in her over the last five days has been dramatic. She is a delightful and precious little person. We are very, very blessed.

Robert and Jill

Happy breakfast Sat morning......
In high chair........
No Chinese Noodle discrimination......Full report to follow

8/19 9am China
“The Noodle and the Smile”
But first where did we leave off? Oh yes Jill was writing a post in the blog and Alia was sat on the floor wailing. Well….we let her sit there and cry herself out. Over one hour later she finally stopped and sat there playing with her paper cup.
We scooped her up, put her in her stroller and went out for our late afternoon walk.
After buying some more supplies including soy milk and more gifts for Jill we returned to the hotel and were about to go for our nightly beer at Roses when it started to rain. Instead we went to the hotel bar. Alia likes bars and was happy to sit there watching the scene.
That night as we had already had Chinese for breakfast and lunch we decided to go back to the Japanese restaurant in the hotel.
No high chairs at that restaurant so we just sat Alia in her stroller, Jill sitting next to her and Robert on the other side of the table.
Our first dish came. Udon noodles in soup. Jill decided to feed one of the long thick noodles to Alia, it hung out of her mouth as she tried to suck it in. That was kinda fun….let’s do it again.
“Oh my God…I think she tried to smile” said Jill. I stood up so I could see her across the table as another noodle went into her mouth and lo and behold our baby daughter smiled!
Not once but twice and three times and again and again! I gave her a thumbs up and she tried to imitate me and stuck a finger up, again and again. It was like a great wall had lifted. We cried and got emotional.
Now don’t get us wrong here, we know that this was just one extremely important moment in the life of our daughter, and as I can attest to at this very moment as I am typing this the days of crying and wailing endlessly are not over, and let us also remember that it was a Japanese “Udon” Noodle and not a Chinese Noodle that made her smile.
But this was the day of the “Noodle and the Smile”
After dinner the happy trio returned to the room and once again put Alia to sleep with out too much ado.
She slept 9:30pm – 7:30am

We gently woke Alia and she awoke a little less grumpy that usual, we played hair brush and thumbs up with our groggy baby for a while sitting on Jill’s lap.
When Jill went to get dressed I took over baby duties and she once again wailed. Did not want me at all. I played with her for a little bit and then sat her on the floor to let her cry it out again.
I started to write this post and let her cry for another 20 minutes while Alia rubbed her cookie all over her face.
She finally calmed down and now it’s time to play again and go for a later than anticipated breakfast.

Robert and Jill

Fri 8/18 8:22pm China.
Alia's First Smile!!!!!!!
Stay Tuned for Full Story!!!!!
When we wake up in the China AM!!!
Love to All!!!!!

Our sleeping Angel



Robert Slinging Alia

August 18, 2006 China 3:41PM
We woke up at 7:00 am to a quiet room. Looked at Alia and she was sleeping peacefully. We put her favorite Chinese Folk Music on and started to make some noise.
We sat by her crib expectantly, sure that she would wake up the perfect child, then she opened her eyes, and…….. “WAAAAAAAAAH—who are you two white aliens with weird eyes and why won’t you go awaaaaaay!”
Onward and upward, we decided to brave the buffet again and she was a very, very good baby. Fed her oatmeal, juice, yogurt, cereal, biscuits, scrambled eggs, and she ate and ate.
She was very interested in all the other babies and started pointing. (thank god, she is gifted!)
After breakfast, we met Amy, who took us out on yet another shopping expedition. That Amy is a clever cookie, and must be getting a lot of payoffs! We decided to try to carry Alia in the sling a different way today, since it killed my back yesterday when she was hanging from my front….Robert would carry her on his back. We got into the mall, and loaded her onto her daddy’s back, after several failed attempts when her legs ended up through the arm holes. She quickly fell asleep, hanging like a rag doll. Robert looked kind of geeky with that sling on.
This market we went to is for the local people and not a lot of tourists go there. We quickly created quite a stir. All kinds of Chinese children came up to us, smiling and pointing, along with all other ages of people. We purchased a necklace for me today!!
Then went to a toy store, where we bought six stuffed animals to take to Alia’s former orphanage, when we visit on Monday. One problem with Alia being on Robert’s back, is we did not see her try to shoplift a small coin purse with a kitty on it. Needless to say, we bought it for her and she has not looked at it since.
We next went to a dress shop where I got a silk top. Robert was singing and dancing with Alia all over the shop, and the Chinese ladies told Amy to tell him that he was a very good father. Alia seemed to be enjoying it too.
To end our expedition, we went to a local Chinese restaurant (we did not learn from our experience yesterday). When we walked in to this very large restaurant it was like we were Rock Stars. All heads turned, and we were the subject of great interest as we were seated. Amy ordered us more disgusting dishes with strange and unknown animal parts in them. I had told Robert that I might throw up, so I just had a coke.
BUT, this was still a meal I will always remember for two reasons. First, Alia made her first steps in accepting the good life. She totally relaxed, took it all in, and started playing the drums with her chopsticks. It was the first time we could see that she was appreciating all this new stuff! Second, many of the Chinese people in the restaurant came over to say hi to Alia. They caressed her and kissed her, and kept nodding to Robert and I with big smiles on their faces. Finally, a withered old woman with metal teeth came up as we were leaving, stroked Alia and gave us the thumbs up signal!!!
On the way back to the hotel Amy told us, that all the people in the restaurant were very glad and happy to see that one of their culture’s abandoned babies, had found a good forever home. We came up to the room and Alia and I curled up for a long Chinese nap, while Robert worked out, to burn off some of the weird stuff he ate. As I write this, Alia is screaming her guts out, but we are trying the tough love approach, pretending we do not hear her. I actually do not, as I have gone deaf. We will soon go out for the afternoons adventures—mission: coloring book and crayons and hopefully a beer

Little shoes, Big shoes
Alia in Sling
Alia, Jill and Amy in the Civil Affairs Office

Fri 8-20 China

Yesterday afternoon 2:30.
Our final official duties for a week. We met Amy downstairs and went back again to the civil Affairs Office. Jill wore Alia in her new sling.
The folks from the civil Affairs Office gave us the official adoption certificate and then we had to take that along with our passports to the Police Station.
One at the Police Station they sat us down took a few more police photos and it was over.
Our next official duty wont be until late next week.

Amy then took us to the "Free Trade Center" where she badly wanted us to buy a Jade birthday pendant for Alia. As this seemed to be tradition we complied. Alia was born in the year of the Rooster so we purchased a Jade rooster pendant with the Chinese symbol of "Happiness" on the reverse side.
As Alia probably came from a Buddhist family we also purchased a small Jade Buddha.

Tomorrow there will be more shopping opportunities as Amy wants us to buy Pearls and many other gifts at the market she's taking us to.

Next Amy took us for a very early dinner at one of her favorite restaurants. The fish entrail/gut stew was not entirely satisfying but the Tofu was good.
You can see how much Alia enjoyed it all.

After we arrived back at the hotel we realized that it was too early to sleep so we put our daughter in the stroller and went back out to the riverside bar "Roses" to have a Tiger Beer and watch the light show that happens on the river every night at 8pm.
Alia remained sad but relatively quiet in her stroller.
Jill sat her up for the light show but she wailed on her lap then really wailed on mine. Back in the stroller for our daughter.
Back at the hotel getting ready for bed Jill cleaned Alia's teeth for the first time, she didn't know if she should cry or enjoy the gum massage. I think it felt good to her but I'm not sure if she wanted to admit it.
We put our sad little girl in the Crib, played her a Children's Chinese CD that Amy gave us and within a few minutes she was asleep.

Slept 9:30pm - 7am.

more to come later....

Alia in her Stroller

Asleep in the crib with Mr Parrott

Thursday Aug 17 11:30am China

Yesterday afternoon/evening.
After our baby woke up we dressed her and put her in her stroller and went out onto the streets to look for a pair of sandals.
Alia seems comforted in her stroller and has been remaining calm in it.
We purchased a cute pair of pink sandals and then stopped at the local outdoor restaurant bar next to the hotel and had a drink.
The hotel is situated on The Pearl River, a very large but polluted waterway. As far as the eye can see you have those ugly apartment and office building probably built in the late 50s and 60s. Many of them have been completely covered with tacky lights that light up the night time sky when the sun sets.
Guangzhou has been very humid but last night there was a soft gentle breeze as we sat outside. Alia just holding onto Mr Parrot and waiting for the next moment to happen.
After a brief stop back in the hotel room where Alia between crying ate some more Congee (left overs) we ventured to Dinner.
Last night we chose the Japanese restaurant in the hotel and had some more Tofu. Alia had a few mouthfulls. We let her stay in her stroller as she is not yet able to sit in a high chair without screaming.
After dinner we put her back into the crib, she cried for a few moments and the went to sleep. Robert and Jill poured themselves a scotch and a vodka respectfully, talked for a while and then joined Alia in slumberland.

Today:
Alia started yelling....yelling not crying at 6am. Another good eight hours sleep. Robert got out of bed and walked to the crib to see his little Alia standing up and holding onto the crib bars. Robert lifted her out of the crib and brought her into the bedroom.
This morning Alia decided that she did not want Robert at all...only Jill. She grabbed onto Jill in the bed, stopped crying and immediately fell asleep on top of her. Anytime Robert tried to get into the act she would cry again.

We had a hard morning with her. When we got out of bed and sat her on the floor to play with her she just cried and cried and hung onto Mr Parrot for dear life. We did our best to be funny and entertain, but to no avail.
We think that her teeth and gums were hurting her and put some baby orajel on her, but another common theory is that adopted children often grieve for several days or weeks after leaving their orphanage. They believe that they have been rejected by their caregivers and now in turn reject their new caregivers because they don't trust them and are scared that we may abandon them.

We finally got Alia dressed and went down to breakfast.
You have to understand that The White Swan is full of parents and their adopted children so breakfast is quite a scene. Many have just received their new child, some have had their child for a week or two and are almost on their way home, many are adopting their second child and have their first in tow. It is so amusing to watch all these kids and parents gathered together at the buffet. The White Swan is also a business hotel and we saw one guy obviously here on business sitting alone, smoking and with a large headset on bobbing to whatever he was listening to. He had definitely blocked out the rest of the world and the kids.
We tried to sit Alia in a high chair but that was definitely not in the stars today, so we left her in her stroller.
Back in the room more crying and rejection. Robert put his swinging Sinatra CD on his computer, picked her up and sang and danced with her. She has good taste, she calmed down and fell asleep during Robert's performance. ....Robert's quite used to that happening.
She is now back in her crib clutching Mr Parrott asleep.
More to come later today....

Alia and Mr Parrott
Alia eating Tofu
Robert eating Tofu

3pm 8-16 China

Alia's first night as a Kalfin ended peacefully:

After the attempted Cheerios feeding we strapped Alia into her borrowed stroller and ventured to the 7/11. The orphanage had told us that she still liked formula at night so we went on a search for that as well as other baby supplies. 7/11 wasn't great, didn't even have a decent slurpee flavor so we went in search of a better store.
Eventually we found one but were still at a loss trying to cope with the language barrier to get what we needed.
Thankfully there was a veteran couple from Manchester who were adopting for a second time who helped us out....and we needed help. Just by way of example we were about to buy the extra large diapers, that's how we were reading Chinese.
With supplies in hand we walked back to the Hotel, Alia taking it all in, silent but wondering what the hell she was doing there and why.
We decided to go to one of the hotel's Chinese restaurants for dinner. Alia sat in the high chair for a short while before she started to wail. She would not eat any rice which was another of her supposedly favorite foods. We took it in turns to comfort her.
Our daughter stops crying the moment either of us picks her up and holds her. She has a mouth full of impacting teeth and we think she may be in some pain from teething.
After dinner we went back up to our room.
As we are at this hotel for so long we have a small Jr Suite, we have the crib in the living room part of the suite.
We laid Alia down in the crib and it did not take long for her to fall fast asleep cuddling her favorite new toy, Mr Parrot.
It was 10:20pm and we were both exhausted so we too went to bed and fell asleep. So ended the most important day.
Good Night and Sweet Dreams.

We awoke several times during the night expecting to hear Alia cry but each time she was fast asleep.
We resisted the temptation to wake her up ourselves to cuddle her.

7am 8/16 the phone rang with our wake up call. We couldn't believe it!
Alia still sound asleep. From 10:20pm to 7am. A mighty sound and long sleeper, just like her mom.
We gently awoke our daughter and then tried to feed her, but again she wasn't interested and cried. The orphanage had told us that she loved to take a bath in the mornings so Jill got into her bikini, put some luke warm water in the bottom of the bath and attempted to bathe our little naked Alia.
Let's just say it was not like a fish to water.
She screamed and screamed. We managed to get her clean and Robert swaddled her in a big hotel towel to dry her. Again we tried to feed her but all she managed was a couple of grains of rice.
It was 8:15am and time to perform our morning duties.
We went downstairs and met our interpreter, Amy and were whisked off to the Civil Affairs Office.
Once at the office a family photo was taken for their files and then we were led into an interview. We were asked several questions including how to say our child's Chinese name. We were then made to promise "Not to torture or abandon our baby". After that we had a second interview with a notary who asked us the same questions and then pronounced that in the eyes of the Chinese Government Alia Maggie Kalfin now belonged to us!

To celebrate we all went out to a Tea House and gardens. To start with we walked around the Bonzai garden, holding Alia as we left the stroller at the hotel. I must say that it was nice to see some natural beauty in a city that is this huge and industrial. After the walk we sat down in the tea house and sampled many teas.
The ladies that worked there took it in turns to look after Alia. She certainly seems trusting in strange ladies arms.
After tea Amy took us to a very popular local restaurant so Robert could engorge himself in the delights of the local Tofu.
While Robert was in Tofu heaven, lo and behold his daughter, Alia showed the world that like her daddy she too was a Tofu fan! So along with the Tofu and the Congee we ordered her Alia had her first substantial meal.
We headed back to the hotel our civic duties over for the day. All this and it was only noon.

We laid Alia down on our king bed and she started to howl again. This time we let her cry and as you can see she soon was in dreamland with Mr Parrot.

It's been only 24hrs since we were given Alia and already great strides have been made.
We have yet to see her walk, although she has stood up and supported herself and we have yet to see our poor baby smile.
All in good time.

Love Jill and Robert

7:25pm 8/15 China Time:

Alia's first Cheerios - feeding herself!
Also just changed our first Diaper.....went OK.

6:30pm China:
2 more photos with mum and dad:

Gotcha Day 8/15 6:20pm China

Alia is ours! And as you can see she is thrilled about it.

We woke up early after a good three hours of sleep and decided to go to the gym, that was followed by a buffet breakfast and a walk around the neighborhood.
Every store close by is in the adoption business. They all "loan" strollers in the hope that you will buy from them.
As we suspected many, many adopted babies at this hotel and they are all so cute....and they all seem happy. We think that most of them have been here at least a week. We represent the new wave of folks coming in.

We spent our last couple of hours as childless parents in our room lying on the bed counting minutes and not quite believing what was about to happen in our lives.

It was time:
We were taken to the Civil Affairs Office at 2:00pm and happened to bump into Alia and her caregivers while waiting for the elevator.
This was not supposed to happen. Alia was sullen and grasping onto her Nanny. At that point we could not take her, but we traveled up in the elevator and were escorted to separate rooms.
She seemed smaller that we had thought she would be (Probably all those large blown up photos of her) but she was beautiful, and would shortly be ours.
We had to sign many documents including the Chinese one that says we have her for a trial period between 3pm today and 9am tomorrow. After 9am tomorrow she is legally our in the eyes of the Chinese Law. We then paid our 3 grand donation (in the required crisp new american bills) to the orphanage and Alia was handed over to us.
As expected she wailed and wailed for a while.
We then had another little ceremony in front of a flag at the center and was presented with a certificate and then off we went back to the hotel.
Alia calmed down in Jill's arms on the way home but once back in the room she cried and cried.
Jill and I took turns holding her and dancing to some Chinese Feng Shui Music that I had brought along and she once again seemed to like that. She was certainly more apprehensive of me that she was of Jill.....oh but when we danced she would calm right down.
Finally she laid down on the bed on top of Jill and fell asleep.
She's just waking up now.
Family and Friends we have the most beautiful daughter in the world and we love her.
Alia Maggie Kalfin....Welcome to our world.

Love Robert and Jill

Tuesday 6:30 am Chinese time

We made it, we are here! Cannot believe it, finally, twenty months later. The Hotel is beautiful, overlooking the Pearl River. Our room is on the 26th floor, with a city/river view, and the cutest little crib.

Our journey was wonderful. Ate, slept, and read baby how to on the plane. Arrived into Hong Kong, enjoyed the beautiful airport for an hour (Presidents club, noodle soup) then connection to Guangzhou. Our translator, Amy was there to greet us, our luggage arrived in one piece and by midnite we were at the White Swan Hotel. We unpacked, (place looks like a nursery), and went out exploring. Found a beautiful bar on the river and toasted our last night together as a childless couple! Actually got some sleep.

We just got up on "Gotcha Day" and we are jazzed baby. Going to the gym, shower, breakfast, shop for a stroller, paperwork, and leave for the Civil Office at 2:00pm to receive Alia at 2:30. Yikes, and yikes again. Stand by until later, counting down.........

Here we are at the President's Club in Newark. Left way early but breezed thru check in and there was very little security.
Thought we'd take the extra time on our hands to brush up on some much needed skills!

We leave for the airport in under two hours!

Leaving plenty of time because of the new security factors. This must be the first time that Robert has checked luggage in decades.

We are nervous, a little scared, wired, bouncing off the wall and very, very excited!

We hope that we can get a good six to eight hours of sleep on our sixteen hour journey to Hong Kong.

Alia has always been in our hearts......But in just over a day Alia will be ours and in our arms.

Look for our next post around Monday evening EST, sometime after eight pm.

Jill and Robert

Updated: Slight change of plans.

We will now be leaving a day later on Sunday Aug 13th and flying on a 16hr flight direct to Hong Kong. We get to Hong Kong on Monday the 14th and take a connecting flight that night to Guangzhou. We will definately receive Alia on Tuesday the 15th. We will stay an extra day in Beijing on the back end of the trip and see a few sights with Alia.
We will arrive home on Aug 31st.
Keep watching for updates!

Finally on the way!
We travel to China Sat Aug 12th

Updated TimeLine:
June 24th: We were assigned a child and received these beautiful pictures of Alia.
She was born April 22nd 2005 and was found on April 25th.
Quoting from the report we received:
"The security of Tai He Village, Qingxin Town received a phone call that there was an infant girl in front of The First Grammer School on April 25th 2005. They could not find her birth parents and she was sent to Quinxin Social Welfare Institute on the same day.
When she entered, she wore white baby clothing and was wrapped in a red blanket. She was in a paper box. Her face color was red and she cried loudly. She was a new born infant. There was a piece of paper showing her date of birth was April 22nd 2005. We gave her the name Qing Xin, Yang Guan"
The report continued to talk about her excellent progress thru her first year in life.

Our next step was to take the report to a pediatric adoption specialist and then to officially "Accept the baby".
Our acceptance was sent to China on June 29th.

From that point we had to wait for Travel acceptance, which is permission to travel to pick up the baby. We were told that could take anywhere from 3 - 7 weeks.

Now that we had pictures of our child every day we became more anxious. We wanted her as soon as we could get her and did not want that beautiful little girl to grow older without us.

July 31st we received travel permission! Before we could confirm our flights and arrangements we next had to apply for our Exit from China appointment at the US Consulate.
We applied that day and several days later received an 11am appointment for Mon Aug 28th.

We were ecstatic. Our plans were to leave on Aug 17th arrive Aug 18th in Beijing. Spend two nights in Beijing and then fly to Guangzhou where we would receive Alia on the 20th or 21st.
We would return home on Aug 30th.

Aug 7th:
Best laid Plans..................
We find out that a new law was enacted in the Guangdon Province (which is where Alia is from). Any child adopted from that province must now stay in China for 10 business days with her parents to be before being allowed an exit interview. This meant that we would have to stay in China an extra week!
To cut a long story short we have been told that for "Us" they have made an exception and have cut the 10 day rule to 8 days?!#*.
We had to make a very quick decision to stay longer or to leave earlier.
We scrambled and are now at this very moment preparing to leave for China this Saturday Aug 12th. Arrive in Beijing Aug 13th. Fly to
Guangzhou Aug 15th and receive Alia that evening or Aug 16th.
We keep our exit interview for Aug 28th and return home with our daughter on the 30th.

Must get ready to leave!

Watch this blog, from Aug 14th we will be writing daily posts with pictures of this incredible journey!

Love Jill and Robert

Hi All,
We know it has been a while, but we kept waiting, hoping we would hear something. Things in China have slowed down and they are only releasing half the amount of babies that they were each month. So we have gotten delayed by three to five months. UGH!!
However, we are getting closer. We hope to get our referral by the end of May and travel mid-summer if all goes well. Stay tuned............

Jupiter Celebration, October 1, 2005

Over 100 people shared in celebrating the adoption of our daughter, Alia. As the guest list grew, so did the anticipation and excitement. Many relatives, old friends, former students, and amazing parents of former students, came together in a grand reunion --more then ten years for a lot of the old JDC gang.
The joy and happiness at seeing everyone again was indescribable. The reminiscing brought up memories I had forgotten at that amazing time in my life. I can only hope that Alia will grow up to be as amazing as my Jill's Dance Center women are.
As we all were treated to a performance by up and coming dancers, I looked around and remembered everyone as they were when I left and seeing what wonderful people they are now, and was extremely touched and proud that I played a small part in all your lives.
I was so very sorry to see the evening end, but the warmth in my heart is still alive, and Robert and I will carry all your love with us to China when we get our little girl.

To see some fun photos of the celebration, please click on the link below. If this does not work please cut and paste the following link into your address bar:

http://photoshow.comcast.net/watch/tG4kq4Xc

Here we are in front of our Adoption Table on Sept 18th as we prepare for our New Jersey Adoption Celebration Party. The Adoption Table included a history of China and its orphan girls, pictures of friends of ours who have recently returned from China with a beautiful baby girl, and a description of the name Alia. That same afternoon 50 of our friends came together in a great celebration of adoption. Chinese lanterns, candles, fans, music and food contributed to a festive atmosphere honoring the Chinese culture. The Adoption Table was enjoyed by all. As it was the day of August Moon (the Chinese equivalent of our Thanksgiving), we invited a Chinese Dancer called Mie, to perform a beautiful and touching Chinese fan dance in honor of the holiday. Soon a full moon shown over the Celebration. As our special guests left, elated and joyous at this wonderful event, we turned to look up at the moon....and seemed to see the face of a little Chinese girl already named Alia, gazing back from a lonely crib. Alia, we are coming.

In China, in order to control the population growth, there is a law that limits each family to one child. There is a deeply entrenched cultural preference for male children, especially among the farming communities, as they will support the parents in their old age and carry on the lineage. If the first born is a girl, she will most often be abandoned or even killed. The lucky ones get adopted....

We choose you, Alia

..to fill our days with a more meaningful purpose

..because the love of a family is meant to be shared

..to add new joy to our lives

Please join us in ...

The Journey of Adoption

Jan 1998 - Dec 16th 2004

Talked about adopting a child

Dec 17th 2004

Vacationed in Aruba and met a wonderful family with two beautiful adopted daughters from China. After talking to them and seeing the loving relationship they all had for each other we decided that weekend that we would procrastinate no longer and start the adoption process the moment we returned home.

Dec 20th 2004

We placed a call to "Seedlings" a highly respected adoption agency in

Parsippany, NJ.

Dec 22nd 2004

Completed Seedlings initial application form.

Dec 25th 2004

Flew to Naples, FL and announced to Jill's Family our plans to adopt a little girl from China.

Jan 10th 2005

Jill fills out lots of forms

Jan 12th 2005

US Citizenship and Immigration Services fingerprint application sent.

Jan 18th 2005

Trip to Parsippany for first set of Fingerprints for the Immigration and Naturalization Service (INS)

Jan 19th 2005

Required family information meeting at Seedlings

Jan 20th 2005

Jill fills out more forms......

Jan 26th 2005

Robert has required physical and passes.

Jan 29th 2005

First required pre-adoption home study with our Social Worker, Amy. Jill was interviewed.

Feb 3rd 2005

Trip to Montclair Police Station to be fingerprinted for local Police clearance to show that we are not sex offenders......We Passed!

Feb 4th 2005

Jill has required Physical and passes.

Feb 5th 2005

Attended Chinese New Year celebrations at Seedlings for all the adopted families

Feb 7th 2005

Jill still filling out forms.......

Feb 8th 2005

Second required home study with Amy. Robert interviewed.

Feb 16th 2005

Our third and final pre-adoption home study with Amy.

Feb 18th 2005

Flew to Jupiter, FL to announce to the Kalfin family that we are adopting.

Feb 24th 2005

Seedlings received all paper so far plus the Home Study report to send to the Dept of Homeland Security.

March 4th 2005

Flew to Palm Desert, CA and announced to Robert's Mother that we are adopting.

March 7th 2005

INS receives all papers to date.

March 15th 2005

Received fingerprint appointments from the INS.

March 25th 2005

Trip to downtown Newark to wait in line for 3 hours to get fingerprinted by the INS for clearance by the Department of Homeland Security. We await the results.

April 28th 2005

INS fingerprints cleared. We are not a threat to this nation.

May 2nd 2005

Seedlings send all our papers sent for translation into Chinese.

June 1st 2005

Seedlings sends our completed and translated dossier to China for processing.

From this point in the journey the wait is estimated to be 6 - 7 months before receiving an assignment of a child.

When we receive that assignment it will come with a photograph of Alia a brief medical report and background.

We would expect to travel to China within 3 - 5 weeks from receiving the assignment.

The required length of stay in China is about two weeks. You first travel to the province where Alia has been in an orphanage and we will stay there for the first week. We will then travel to Guangzhou which is where the American Embassy that issues exit visas is.

All persons that adopt from China must spend their second week in China in Guangzhou to complete their adoption process.

Alia will become a US Citizen the moment she steps foot on American soil.

Alia's age may be anywhere from 7 months to 24 months.

*We will continue to update this Blog on a regular basis

Robert and Jill Kalfin